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Jokes
Adult computer Jokes
Submitted from A Young Lady! (Hmmm)
whom, would like Men to know, what women really think of us!
What should you do if you see your ex-husband
rolling around in pain on the ground?
Shoot him again.
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How can you tell when a man is well-hung?
When you can just barely slip your finger in
between his neck and the noose.
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What do you call the useless piece of skin on
the end of a man′s Middle Leg?
-His body.
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Why do little boys whine?
-Because they′re practicing to be men.
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
-One - he just holds it up there and waits for the
world to revolve around him.
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How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
-Three - one to screw in the bulb and two to listen
to him brag about the screwing part.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What do you call a handcuffed man?
-Trustworthy.
What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping
for breath and calling your name?
-You didn′t hold the pillow down long enough.
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Why do doctors slap babies butts right after they′re born?
-To knock the Middle Legs!! off the smart ones.
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Why do men name their Middle Legs?
-Because they don′t like the idea of having a stranger
make 90% of their decisions.
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Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm to fertilize one egg?
-Because not one will stop and ask directions.
Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
-To stop the snoring before it starts.
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What′s the best way to kill a man?
-Put a naked woman and a six-pack in front of him then
tell him to pick only one.
What do men and pantyhose have in common?
-They either cling, run or don′t fit right in the crotch!
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Why do men whistle when they′re sitting on the toilet?
-Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
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What is the difference between men and women?
-A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need.
A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
How does a man keep his youth?
-By giving her money, furs and diamonds.
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How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
-Rename the mail folder to "Instruction Manuals"
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Send this to five bright, funny women you know and make their day!!
P.S. AT LEAST FINDING 5 BRIGHT, FUNNY WOMEN IS POSSIBLE